Saturday, November 1st, 2014

Seahawks 27 Ravens 6 The TROY CAN’T SCORE IN THIS O EITHER game

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Once again the Ravens showed their all around ineptitude yesterday, falling without anything close to a fight to the Seattle Seahawks. Troy Smith had a decent day making his first NFL start, but when he is playing behind such a sorry excuse for an NFL offensive line as the Ravens have, it is difficult to give him a fair evaluation. He looked eerily similar to so many Ravens quarterbacks before him, that it only lent further evidence to the theory that it is the offensive system of Brian Billick, and not the guy running it, that is to blame for….

 

We now interrupt this regularly scheduled game recap for the 24-hour-a-day Ravens Christmas Music Channel to begin its broadcast. You will hear such classics as:

Fumblin’ Balls

(Jingle Bells)

 

Fumblin’ all the time

The Ravens can’t move the ball

Offense is a crime,

Not another draw!

 

Secondary blows

Couldn’t cover me

What fun it is, to be our foes

and score so easily!

 

Fumblin’ balls, Fumblin’ balls,

Sizzle was on “Cribs”

Matt Hasselbeck lit us up

and Willis Broke 2 ribs! Hey!

 

Ew, The Ravens Really Suck

(Hark the Herald Angels Sing) 

(Hummed, and Sung, by the Peanuts Kids)

Guuuruuuuuruuuuu Ruuu Ruuu Ruuuu Ruuuu Ruuuu
Guuuuu Ruuuu Ruuuuu Ru Ru Ru Ruuuuuu

Ew, the Ravens really suck
Can’t help themselves, and have bad luck
One yard runs, and two yard passes
He was down! That ref needs glasses!

Painful, all we fans can’t watch
Here comes yet another botch
We’ve never seen play this poor
Crap football in Baltimore

Billick the Guru
(Frosty the Snowman)

Billick the Guru, was a smug and prideful guy
With a wicker hat and a bad playbook, and his offense makes us cry.
Billick the Guru, has three more years to stay
He makes bad calls, and won’t run the ball
Yet somehow still gets paid!

There must have been some magic in that offense of the ‘Vikes
For when he coached that team up there, scoring was one of his “likes”
O’, Billick the Guru, was in love with his big words
And Ravens fans pray, that he’ll go away
So there’s no purple “Free the Birds.”

All L’s
(Noel)

All L’s, All L’s, All L’s, All L’s
The last 10 games of the season, are prob’ly all L’s

Ravens Got Run Over by the Seahawks
(Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer)

Ravens got run over by the Seahawks
Up there in Seattle Christmas Eve (Eve)
You can say there’s such a thing as offense
But those of us in B-More don’t “Believe”

I could go on all day…but I’ll spare you.

Happy Holidays to all of you out there, from your friends at B-More Birds Nest!

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