Sunday, October 26th, 2014

Conference Championship Shmampionship

3

It’s a Nick-A-What?! & NestMinder Special!

With the Ravens season officially over, Nestminder and I have decided to pick up where we left off 2 years ago. Predicting playoff games! The last time we did this in 2007-2008, the Ravens missed the playoffs so it made it a little extra exciting to watch.

As you should know (if you’re reading this you’d better know) that there are only 3 games left in this NFL Season (the Pro Bowl is not a game). How disappointing is that? With all the talks of the 18 game regular season and opening up the league to London, can it be that bad of an idea?

Short answer – yes. Look at some of the talent at QB this year. JaMarcus Russell, Ryan Fitzpatrick, Kyle Boller, Josh Johnson, Josh Freeman, Derek Anderson, Brady Quinn, Bruce Noll; how awful is that? More teams? More games? More blowouts? Yes. I’d love it. Why not right? As long as your favorite team isn’t one of those, you’re in good shape. Moving along…

Colts -7.5 v. Jets

Nick-a-What?! says: Jets +7.5 – So… despite the Colts possibly making the biggest F.U. mistake of their football lives, by folding over at the end of the year and allowing the Jets to make the playoffs (oh the irony!), I have to keep reminding myself that with only 3 games left, I want the most exciting matchup possible in the Super Bowl. Gotta make the most of what you can get right? So, I gotta root for the Colts to make the Super Bowl.

Watching Dirty Sanchez march into Miami with that cast of hard running RBs and stellar Defense simply would not make for a thrilling Super Bowl. No chance that he could lead a 2 minute drill game winning FG/TD against anyone, let alone in the Super Bowl.

Therefore I will be rooting for and I expect the Colts to win. Peyton throws TDs like Dan Snyder throws out coaches. Gotta go with experience in such a big game, that being said… Jets still cover.

Colts 23 Jets 16

Nestminder says:  Colts -7.5 – Last week, leaving the hell-hole that is Indianapolis and their warehouse of a stadium, Ravens fans instantly became Chargers fans.  The Colts fans were absolute douchebags after the game.  Now, I’m sure I invited some of it inside the stadium, and I have no problem with people giving me a hard time in there.  But after the game, just walking around trying to find a cab and not bothering anyone, it was like being in Cleveland.  Never let anyone tell you that Indy fans are friendly.  This is a lie.  And so, like I said, we instantly started salivating at the thought of San Diego once again knocking Peyton & Co. from the playoffs.

Of course, ol’ Norv Turner was to have none of that, and now the Colts get to warm up for the Super Bowl against the Jets.  I don’t see how this game will be close.  The Jets’ offense is the Ravens’ with even LESS of a passing threat.  If the Ravens couldn’t run the ball on the Colts, the Jets won’t find any holes either.  That Colts’ D is just too fast on the rug.

If the Jets are to have any shot, they need to get after Peyton.  On the few occasions when the Ravens blitzed last week, Manning folded like a lawn chair.  Greg Mattison, however, played scared and decided to sit back in coverage and let Peyton pick his defense apart.

Rex Ryan doesn’t know the meaning of “playing scared.”  He will bring the heat on #18 from the opening whistle.  If his blitz-heavy tactics work, have another shot Ravens fans, as what you’ll be seeing COULD have been the purple a week earlier.

Colts 23 Jets 10

Saints -3.5 v. Vikings

Nick-a-What?! says: Saints -3.5 – As a kid who grew up loving sports, there is nothing more important than seeing players have fun on the field – besides your favorite team winning of course. But as I got older and my favorite team got worse and worse you reach for others to root for, and two of my favorite players growing up were Barry Sanders (of course) and Brett Fahhhvruh.

Every day I played backyard football, making ridiculous spin moves and running backwards all the way across the field to try and avoid being tackled like Barry, and when I’d play QB, I’d throw passes with my laser rocket arm and then run down the field with my hands in the air, throwing fists, pointing to the sky then I’d pick up my receiver and carry him around the field like he was a sack of potatoes.

But now, I don’t play too much backyard football, in fact the last two times I’ve played, one guy left with 6 stitches in his mouth and another guy left with a torn achilles tendon.

We’re old. Lets face it.

When we get old we can’t make Barry Sanders moves without leaving our hips stuck in the turf and we can’t carry around our friends on our backs unless we plan on a ruptured disk in our backs and of course we turn to the NFL to make those moves for us and make us say, “Hoooooly Shit that was awesome, I remember when I could do that.”

That being said…I now loathe Brett Favre.

What I neglected to mention above, was that what also attracted me to these players is that they were FRANCHISE Players. They stayed in freezing cold shitty cities and did their job. They played hard no matter what and were one of the best at the their trade. Then Barry retired unexpectedly and years later Favre retired, then he didn’t then he did, blah blah blah, he put his team in a shitty position of not being able to move on with or without him. So he cried wolf one too many times and he got traded. Then after a year of playing in freezing cold weather, he wound up in Minnesota, where he was linked to for years and years by the professor John Clayton at the minimum. Then he screwed his old team and city over to make a dump truck load of money and now he’s a game away from the Super Bowl.

Screw Brett Favre. Which sucks, cause I like Minnesota’s young talents – Rice, Harvin, Peterson, Long Dong Shiancoe. Besides, New Orleans will hang 90 on them. Plus, I’m rooting for the most exciting Super Bowl possible. Saints v. Colts! Then I wouldn’t really be too sad regardless of who won. I don’t want to have to root for the Colts over Favre.

Saints 90 Vikings 28

Nestminder says: Vikings +3.5 So, which team will earn the rights to play the Colts in the Super Bowl? In what looks to be an infinitely more competitive game on paper, the Brett Favres match up against the Breesuses.

Six weeks ago, I would have been all for a Colts-Saints Super Bowl. That is, of course, if they had both remained undefeated. Instead, the Colts tanked and the Saints fell apart down the stretch, but the bye week between Wild Card and Divisional weekends seemed to serve them both well. The Saints plastered the Arizona Cardinals last week.

I’d still like to see the Saints win, just because there is nothing to hate about them (except maybe Kim Kardashian). I just don’t see them moving the ball against that Minny D, who absolutely stifled Tony Romo’s Cowboys last Sunday. Jared Allen’s mullet, along with the Fatty Williamses, won’t have quite as easy a time against New Orleans, but the Saints will be nowhere near the 90 Nick-a-What?! predicted, or even half that amount, for that matter.

That’s right, it’s going to be a Manning-Favre Super Bowl. The talking heads are likely to explode…so at least one good outcome may arise as a result.

Vikings 27 Saints 23

Comments

3 Responses to “Conference Championship Shmampionship”
  1. The Future Mrs. Joe Flacco says:

    I’m so with you Nick-a-What?! I’m tired of Brett Favre and hope the Vikings go down in flames on Sunday.

  2. The Future Mrs. Joe Flacco says:

    We all win, because Brett Favre is OVER!

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