Saturday, March 28th, 2015

“Old Spice Guy” got nothin’ on #52. Get them “body muscles” ready for MNF, Ray.

If you made the original 53 man roster for the 2010 Baltimore Ravens as a wide receiver, you were already sweating bullets. After the Ravens traded for T.J. Houshmandzadeh, it was believed that either Marcus Smith or David Reed would be cut to make room for the perfectly braid-haired wide receiver. News shortly broke from [...]

The Ravens’ already secure receiving situation just received another unexpected boost, as the team signed veteran T.J. Houshmandzadeh to a 1-year deal for the veteran minimum. Houshmandzadeh, who destroyed the Ravens’ secondary for years in Cincinnati, played 2009 in Seattle. Despite poor quarterback play and very little help from the other WRs on the roster, [...]

(SPOILER ALERT:) Earlier today NFL Commish Roger Goodell reduced the previous six game punishment to Steelers douchebag quarterback, Ben Roethlisberger. Cameras were not allowed inside the Commish’s office at NFL headquarters on Park Ave., so BMoreBirdsNest set up hidden cameras to record the whole thing. Here are the excerpts from the conversation earlier this morning. [...]

This little bit of musical genius comes to us courtesy of The Football Girl. I’m in awe/love. Down a dark bathroom hallway.  Cheap grease in his hair. Warm smell of Corona. Bring a stench in the air. Up ahead in the distance she saw a fluorescent light. Her head grew dizzy and her senses dulled. [...]

After the Ravens’ final preseason game last night, I figured it would be a good time to throw my hat in the ring with a 53-man roster “mock.” Here goes… QB 1. Joe Flacco 2. Marc Bulger 3. Troy Smith RB 4. Ray Rice 5. Willis McGahee 6. Jalen Parmele FB 7. Le’Ron McClain WR [...]

Yeah, that’s right – I said “mouth-farts” not “burps.” Once one’s BMI passes the half-century mark, a whole new world of bodily functions opens up. Rex’s latest triple-chili-corn-dog-burrito-induced expulsion of gas from his face sounded suspiciously to the human ear like he was saying that he expects Ravens’ safety Ed Reed to play in the [...]

For the past 13 Augusts, O’s fans have been more than happy to turn the page on their calendars in anticipation for the start of the NFL season in September. During a season where the team once possessed the worst record in baseball and has just absolutely embarrassed themselves night in an night out- the [...]