Wednesday, September 3rd, 2014

Redesigned Bengals Helmets

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For the Ravens’ final game of the regular season, they play the Cincinnati Bengals. As has become recent tradition around these parts, we’re here to give Cincy some more…appropriate…designs for their helmets.

A few years ago, you’d have a harder time finding a player on the Bengals who HADN’T been arrested than one who had. They’ve cleaned up their act a bit recently, but this design is just too good to pass up:

I mean hell, this is still a team that currently employs Adam “Pac Man” Jones, so they’re not totally undeserving. Here’s a helmet just for Adam:

In order to sell out Sunday’s game, Cincy had to resort to some shady tactics in their ticket office – selling “buy one, get one” packages to season ticket holders. Pretty pathetic, Bengals fans.

If they hadn’t the game would – as most of their games are – been blacked out locally. Maybe they should switch to a more basic helmet design until their fan base can get their act together…

This next helmet design honors wide receiver Jerome Simpson. By now everyone has seen his ridiculous acrobatics from last week, but just in case you haven’t…

This one’s for you, Jerome. To thank us, please don’t do anything nearly that incredible against the Ravens, k?

Finally…we couldn’t do Bengals helmets without a little ginger hate, could we?

 

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